Pathetically Un-original…

A poem I came across in my journal, written a couple of months back…

I wear the pain and all these scars,
just another broken girl with a shattered and crushed soul,
And a seriously broken heart.
I should have known, it’d be over from the start.
That in the end, it would all be your fault.
Alas, it’s the price I pay, for loving you with a foolish heart,
while you just lied and used me.
And kept me in the dark.
A truth obscured, one that you will never know.
Justice, I think,
for how you hurt me so.
I’ve made my peace, so to speak.
It’s time to let you go.
Some final words,
this chapter I can close.
It’s just too bad, such a shame.
Even so, I’ll hate you anyway.
To hell with you,
to hell with your twisted and sadistic little mind-game.
Truth be told, I never wanted to play
In the first place.
So childish and lame.
You cheaters are all the same.
Deny it all you want, but you will never change.
Contrary to the pretty words you use,
and empty promises you like to make.
You’re nothing but a liar
and a spineless, cheating snake.
Have you ever heard of a little something called give AND take?
I suggest you look it up,
For everyone’s sake.
And get a start on all those apologies,
I’ve no doubt you will have to make,
for the games you oh so love to play.
And for the lives you’ll wreck and leave in disarray, when you decide
you’re bored and choose to walk away.
And let’s not forget,
all the hearts you seem to like to break,
when in fact, you have no right.
My only consolation, albeit not so nice,
is that karma really is a bitch,
and one day, you will pay the price.
Maybe not today,
Or right away.
But I promise you,
you will pay someday.
You’ll lose,
By the way.
And that alone, if nothing else,
is the truth.
A truth I learned from lessons learned,
a lesson that I learned from you.
Now, who’s the fool?
In answer to that question,
It’s you…

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Patience Is A Virtue, Just Not One Of Mine…

A Poem.

I used to think I had it all.
Always swore that I’d never let myself fall.
Now here I am, looking up from rock bottom.
Thanks to you, I have a whole new set of problems.
thought I knew you oh so well.
I was wrong.
Truth is, I never knew you at all.
So much for all those well-laid plans,
for it’s clear to me now that you never did give a damn.
Now I’m damaged and jaded,
broken. Defective.
Please tell me why you had to take everything, all I had to give,
And left me with nothing.
Only regrets, devastation, and of course, self-destruction.
Tell me, was it all that you hoped it would be?
All that you wanted?
Are you happy now??
But tell me, was it really worth it?
God knows, I didn’t deserve it.
The tears and the pain,
hidden in these haunted, lying eyes of mine.
Clever girl. Perfectly disguised.
Seemingly alive on the surface,
but so dead and numb inside.
It’s all an illusion, lie upon lies.
She’s giving up, through with trying.
Done crying.
For the first time,,
she’s forfeiting the fight;
taking back her life.
She doesn’t think it’s fair,
she knows it’s just not right.
More than anything,
she wishes she had never gone with him that first night.
Or any other night.
What’s done is done,
no point in going back and reminiscing.
He broke her heart, crushed her soul,
and tore her life apart.
He played her for a fool,
with pretty lies and words so cold and cruel.
He proved to her what everyone already knew,
all those times they said to her “he’s only using you.”
As it turns out, that part was true.
They say that all is fair in love and war, and maybe that is true.
But truth be told, there’s just no justice or excuse when you’re the one
thats being used.
In letting someone walk all over you.
Been so long since he and I,
and yet the pain still feels brand new.
Cannot forgive. Cannot forget.
Was any of it real? Was any of it true?
Why do I feel so lost without you?
When I don’t want to.
Nothing will ever be the same.
And HE is the one I blame.
He will never know the truth of what was really done.
That is the consequence of the decision that he made.
When he chose to turn his back on what was right,
wreck a life, and simply walk away.
As for me, I’ve paid my dues.
Accepted my share, if not more, of the blame.
My only consolation, is that one day he will have to do the same.
Until then, I wait.
For the day when I can say,
hello to goodbye,
And for my turn to finally come.
When I’ll be the one that walks away this time,
Leaving nothing behind.
Yours Truly,
Sunshine.

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