THE TRUTH IS MESSIE…

My e-journal, all the nitty-gritty, overly-emotional, sappy stuff…

Planting Roots. January 31, 2015

Filed under: #NYtoTN,family,SCHOOL/CAREERS — MESSIE @ 11:08 pm
Tags: , ,

So today was my first official day working at the Science Center. Well, technically the 2nd, but yesterday was just training, so I’m not counting it. Katy, my supervisor, shadowed me for a few minutes in the morning, but I was on my own the rest of the day. One of the other girls I work with couldn’t believe they’d have my first day be on a Saturday–considering how busy it usually gets on the weekend–but I think I did alright. It was a little overwhelming at first, what with there being so many people and all, but I actually liked that it was that busy–it made the day go by pretty quick. It was non-stop all day from when we opened at 10, all the way up to around 4 or so. We close at 5, so yeah, it was definitely packed.

Granted, it was only my first day, but I like the job already. I think it’s going to work out okay. Interacting with all the kids that come in is fun and the people I work with are so nice and easy to get along with. Two of the girls both work second jobs at the Grand Ole Opry, which is really cool.

Everything is great. School’s going well and so is work. I’m meeting people and making new friends and contacts. I love it. I’m actually surprised it’s going this well, but since it is, I really don’t want to jinx it by second guessing it all. I’m just going to enjoy it. That’s the plan.

In some negative news, my mother’s back in the hospital. She was having pain in her stomach so bad that they had to call an ambulance to take her to the ER. They ended up admitting her today and the last I talked to her, she was waiting to hear from the surgeon on how they were going to proceed and what needed to be done. It’s the kind of news that really sucks, you know? I can’t help but feel a little guilty for being so far away when something like this happens. I mean, I’m 900 miles away, building a new life here without everyone else. I feel bad because I’m not there and there’s really nothing I can do, but at the same time, I don’t want to stop everything I’m doing here, you know? I mean, everything is going so well right now and I’m finally somewhere where I feel like I belong. This is where I want to be. My life is here now. I know I shouldn’t feel guilty for doing what’s best for me and that I deserve this fresh start and all the good things that are happening in my life, but still, it’s hard. I just feel so disconnected from everyone back home, you know? And there’s no quick or easy fix for that, other than giving all of this up and moving back to New York…and I really don’t want to do that. I’m happy here, for the first time in a really long time. I’m not ready to give that up. Does that make me selfish? Honestly, I don’t even know.

So yeah, that’s what’s been going on these days, in a nutshell. I’ve got to work in the morning so it’s time for this girl to call it a good night.

xoMESSIE

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