Perfect Is Overrated

So, I’ve gone and fallen in love … with a band. Yep, it’s true. It happens.

 

And the name of this incredible, apple-of-my-eye band, you might ask? They’re called HEDLEY. And I am head-over-heels, crazy feeling in love.

 

Especially with this one track called “Perfect”. Its lyrics are literally, well…perfect. ūüôā

 

This chorus, for instance…

**

I’m not perfect but I keep trying

’cause that’s what I said I would do from the start.

I’m not alive if I’m lonely, so please don’t leave.

Was it something I said or just my personality?

I know I’m not perfect but I keep trying

’cause that’s what I said I would do from the start.

I know I’m not perfect but I keep trying…

**

I mean, come on, who hasn’t been there before…who hasn’t stared at the retreating back of a person they¬†liked–or maybe even loved–and wondered what they could have done or said to make him/her stay? We’ve all been there. Well…most of us, anyhow. And us girls especially–we’ll literally analyze every moment, every conversation, every word spoken…rethink every decision we ever made, every action we took…and when we finally (it’s a matter of WHEN, not IF) fall to the proverbial rock bottom, it’s ourselves we hold liable and assume are to blame…even when we’re¬†not. It doesn’t matter who does the walking away…we blame ourselves for the loss…the failure. At first it’s superficial, then the blame and self-doubt goes deeper…under the surface. The blame becomes internal…more personal. We start to question our looks/appearance, our personalities, our self worth, and ultimately our identity as it relates to who we are. We start to circle all our faults and flaws and insecurities with this figuratively bold–albeit invisible to anyone but our own self–bright red permanent marker. We get paranoid and neurotic and we start to obsess over these so-called “flaws” until the obsession and ¬†all those¬†doubts begin to cloud our judgement and take control of our lives…until it consumes us.

Until it destroys us…and everything/everyone we love and care about–though unintentional–becomes collateral damage. We don’t mean for it to happen, but it happens all the same. Naturally, it’s different for each of us. Some are fortunate and just so naturally complete¬†in¬†their self-awareness that they can handle the fall-out with little to none lingering/lasting¬†damage. And then there’s the rest of us who¬†are just not that strong. That can’t let go that easily or move on that quickly–acting as if nothing had ever happened.. Some of us are dizzy with doubt and end up¬†allowing ourselves to succumb to all the guilt and insecurity. Some of us have lost faith in ourselves and aren’t able to get it back. We put too much pressure on ourselves to be perfect…to fix those imperfections…if not to win him/her back, then to be at least prepared for the next time, and that¬†next someone. Until eventually, it becomes a control thing. A way to keep some sanity and control over our lives. We change ourselves to fit the needs and wants of another…and we lose ourselves in the process. Until it becomes less about that person and/or about what happened and more about fitting the “ideal”… that state of being and achievement that we call perfection. We starve ourselves to fit the status quo, to blend in because standing out is far too¬†terrifying for us to even consider. In the blink of an eye it seems as though everything that we once were ceases to exist.

And all the while, we fail to see the reality of it all…the reality of what and who we are. It’s a vicious cycle, that perfection business. Some reach the pinnacle…and others spend their entire lives reaching for it.

**

When you’re caught in a lie,

and you’ve got nothing to hide,

When you’ve got nowhere to run,¬†

and you’ve got nothing inside.¬†

It tears right through me,

you thought that you knew me,

you thought that you knew me…

**

But its as we all know…imperfection is inevitable. And you shouldn’t have to change yourself for anyone. And if they truly care about/love you…they won’t ask you to. They’ll love you just the way you are…

xoMESSIE

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